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Show Notes
The Thin Book of Trust, Third Edition (Charles Feltman)
- Amazon USA Store: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0CV7BZ14D?tag=9natree-20
- Amazon Worldwide Store: https://global.buys.trade/The-Thin-Book-of-Trust%2C-Third-Edition-Charles-Feltman.html
- Apple Books: https://books.apple.com/us/audiobook/living-trusts-wills-retirement-tax-estate-planning/id1815327185?itsct=books_box_link&itscg=30200&ls=1&at=1001l3bAw&ct=9natree
- eBay: https://www.ebay.com/sch/i.html?_nkw=The+Thin+Book+of+Trust+Third+Edition+Charles+Feltman+&mkcid=1&mkrid=711-53200-19255-0&siteid=0&campid=5339060787&customid=9natree&toolid=10001&mkevt=1
- Read more: https://mybook.top/read/B0CV7BZ14D/
#workplacetrust #teamcollaboration #leadershipcommunication #commitmentsandreliability #trustrepair #TheThinBookofTrustThirdEdition
These are takeaways from this book.
Firstly, Trust as an Assessment, Not a Mystery, A central idea in the book is that trust is not something you either have or do not have; it is an assessment that people make based on what they observe and experience. This shift matters because it moves trust from the realm of vague impressions into a domain where individuals and teams can take responsibility and act. When trust is treated as an assessment, you can ask practical questions like what behavior caused someone to increase or decrease trust, and what evidence would rebuild it. The book encourages readers to notice that different people can assess the same situation differently depending on expectations, history, and risk tolerance. That makes trust a dynamic relationship phenomenon rather than a fixed label attached to a person. In a workplace setting, this framing helps reduce moralizing language such as calling someone untrustworthy and replaces it with a more useful diagnosis of what dimension of trust is being evaluated. It also highlights that trust depends on context: you might trust a colleague’s technical judgment yet not trust their follow through on deadlines. By treating trust as a set of assessments, the book equips readers to pinpoint the real problem and choose responses that address it directly.
Secondly, The Four Distinctions: Sincerity, Reliability, Competence, and Care, Feltman is known for organizing trust into four distinctions that make it easier to discuss and improve. Sincerity focuses on whether people believe you mean what you say and say what you mean. Reliability addresses whether you do what you commit to and manage expectations when circumstances change. Competence covers the ability to do what is needed, including skills, judgment, and the capacity to learn. Care refers to whether people believe you will act with their interests in mind, not only your own. The value of these distinctions is diagnostic precision. Many workplace trust conflicts spiral because teams talk in generalities, but these categories help identify which dimension is actually at issue. For example, a missed deadline may not be a care problem; it may be reliability or competence, or unclear commitments. Similarly, a leader who communicates enthusiastically but later shifts direction without acknowledging it may be seen as lacking sincerity. The model also clarifies that trust is multi dimensional: strengths in one area do not automatically compensate for weaknesses in another. By providing a shared vocabulary, the distinctions make feedback conversations more actionable. Instead of debating character, people can agree on what changed in behavior and what would restore confidence.
Thirdly, Commitments, Expectations, and the Mechanics of Reliability, In day to day work, reliability often becomes the most visible trust signal because it is tied to promises, deadlines, and coordination. The book emphasizes that reliability is not only about keeping commitments; it is also about making clear commitments in the first place and renegotiating them early when conditions change. Many teams damage trust through ambiguity: people assume agreement when none was explicitly made, or they accept tasks without clarifying scope, timing, and dependencies. When expectations remain implicit, missed expectations feel like broken promises even if the other person never intended that outcome. The book’s approach encourages readers to treat commitments as agreements that should be specific, realistic, and tracked. It also highlights the trust preserving power of timely communication. Informing stakeholders early that a commitment is at risk, offering options, and asking for a revised agreement often protects trust better than silent struggle followed by late delivery. Reliability also includes consistency of behavior: colleagues watch patterns, not isolated events. By focusing on the mechanics of expectation setting, renegotiation, and follow through, the reader gains practical levers for reducing friction in cross functional work. Over time, small improvements in reliability compound into smoother collaboration, fewer escalations, and greater willingness to depend on one another.
Fourthly, Candor and Sincerity in Workplace Conversations, Sincerity is closely tied to communication, especially the alignment between what people say, what they do, and what they appear to intend. The book encourages a form of candor that is both direct and respectful, aimed at increasing clarity rather than winning. In workplaces, trust often erodes when people avoid difficult truths, offer partial information, or signal agreement while privately disagreeing. This does not require outright deception to be damaging; even well meaning politeness can lead to confusion and later resentment. The book’s trust framework helps readers distinguish between being kind and being unclear, and it supports choosing language that expresses real intent. Sincerity also includes owning your perspective: stating what you know, what you do not know, and what you are assuming. That reduces the risk of overpromising and later appearing dishonest. Another element is congruence, where actions match stated values and priorities. Teams watch leaders closely for this alignment, and small inconsistencies can create skepticism. By making sincerity a visible practice, the book offers a route to healthier feedback loops. People become more willing to raise risks early, challenge decisions productively, and speak about constraints, which improves decision quality and reduces the hidden costs of silence.
Lastly, Repairing Trust: Accountability, Learning, and Rebuilding Care, Trust is inevitably strained by mistakes, competing priorities, or rapid change, so the book’s practical value includes how to repair trust after it is damaged. Repair begins with accurately identifying what was violated: sincerity, reliability, competence, or care. An apology that does not match the breach can make things worse, such as apologizing for a misunderstanding when the issue was repeated unreliability. Effective repair also depends on accountability, including acknowledging impact without defensiveness and clarifying what will change. The book emphasizes rebuilding through behavior, not declarations. People regain confidence when they see consistent follow through, transparent communication, and improved competence where needed. Care is especially important in repair because injured trust often includes the belief that one person valued their own agenda over the relationship. Rebuilding care can involve demonstrating curiosity about the other person’s experience, making fair tradeoffs, and taking visible steps to prevent recurrence even when inconvenient. The book also implies a learning oriented mindset: treat breakdowns as data about systems, expectations, and capabilities, not just personal failures. In organizational settings, leaders can model trust repair by naming issues early, inviting feedback, and reinforcing norms that make it safe to speak up. Over time, a team that repairs trust well becomes more resilient and less fragile under pressure.
- Amazon USA Store: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0CV7BZ14D?tag=9natree-20
- Amazon Worldwide Store: https://global.buys.trade/The-Thin-Book-of-Trust%2C-Third-Edition-Charles-Feltman.html
- Apple Books: https://books.apple.com/us/audiobook/living-trusts-wills-retirement-tax-estate-planning/id1815327185?itsct=books_box_link&itscg=30200&ls=1&at=1001l3bAw&ct=9natree
- eBay: https://www.ebay.com/sch/i.html?_nkw=The+Thin+Book+of+Trust+Third+Edition+Charles+Feltman+&mkcid=1&mkrid=711-53200-19255-0&siteid=0&campid=5339060787&customid=9natree&toolid=10001&mkevt=1
- Read more: https://mybook.top/read/B0CV7BZ14D/
#workplacetrust #teamcollaboration #leadershipcommunication #commitmentsandreliability #trustrepair #TheThinBookofTrustThirdEdition
These are takeaways from this book.
Firstly, Trust as an Assessment, Not a Mystery, A central idea in the book is that trust is not something you either have or do not have; it is an assessment that people make based on what they observe and experience. This shift matters because it moves trust from the realm of vague impressions into a domain where individuals and teams can take responsibility and act. When trust is treated as an assessment, you can ask practical questions like what behavior caused someone to increase or decrease trust, and what evidence would rebuild it. The book encourages readers to notice that different people can assess the same situation differently depending on expectations, history, and risk tolerance. That makes trust a dynamic relationship phenomenon rather than a fixed label attached to a person. In a workplace setting, this framing helps reduce moralizing language such as calling someone untrustworthy and replaces it with a more useful diagnosis of what dimension of trust is being evaluated. It also highlights that trust depends on context: you might trust a colleague’s technical judgment yet not trust their follow through on deadlines. By treating trust as a set of assessments, the book equips readers to pinpoint the real problem and choose responses that address it directly.
Secondly, The Four Distinctions: Sincerity, Reliability, Competence, and Care, Feltman is known for organizing trust into four distinctions that make it easier to discuss and improve. Sincerity focuses on whether people believe you mean what you say and say what you mean. Reliability addresses whether you do what you commit to and manage expectations when circumstances change. Competence covers the ability to do what is needed, including skills, judgment, and the capacity to learn. Care refers to whether people believe you will act with their interests in mind, not only your own. The value of these distinctions is diagnostic precision. Many workplace trust conflicts spiral because teams talk in generalities, but these categories help identify which dimension is actually at issue. For example, a missed deadline may not be a care problem; it may be reliability or competence, or unclear commitments. Similarly, a leader who communicates enthusiastically but later shifts direction without acknowledging it may be seen as lacking sincerity. The model also clarifies that trust is multi dimensional: strengths in one area do not automatically compensate for weaknesses in another. By providing a shared vocabulary, the distinctions make feedback conversations more actionable. Instead of debating character, people can agree on what changed in behavior and what would restore confidence.
Thirdly, Commitments, Expectations, and the Mechanics of Reliability, In day to day work, reliability often becomes the most visible trust signal because it is tied to promises, deadlines, and coordination. The book emphasizes that reliability is not only about keeping commitments; it is also about making clear commitments in the first place and renegotiating them early when conditions change. Many teams damage trust through ambiguity: people assume agreement when none was explicitly made, or they accept tasks without clarifying scope, timing, and dependencies. When expectations remain implicit, missed expectations feel like broken promises even if the other person never intended that outcome. The book’s approach encourages readers to treat commitments as agreements that should be specific, realistic, and tracked. It also highlights the trust preserving power of timely communication. Informing stakeholders early that a commitment is at risk, offering options, and asking for a revised agreement often protects trust better than silent struggle followed by late delivery. Reliability also includes consistency of behavior: colleagues watch patterns, not isolated events. By focusing on the mechanics of expectation setting, renegotiation, and follow through, the reader gains practical levers for reducing friction in cross functional work. Over time, small improvements in reliability compound into smoother collaboration, fewer escalations, and greater willingness to depend on one another.
Fourthly, Candor and Sincerity in Workplace Conversations, Sincerity is closely tied to communication, especially the alignment between what people say, what they do, and what they appear to intend. The book encourages a form of candor that is both direct and respectful, aimed at increasing clarity rather than winning. In workplaces, trust often erodes when people avoid difficult truths, offer partial information, or signal agreement while privately disagreeing. This does not require outright deception to be damaging; even well meaning politeness can lead to confusion and later resentment. The book’s trust framework helps readers distinguish between being kind and being unclear, and it supports choosing language that expresses real intent. Sincerity also includes owning your perspective: stating what you know, what you do not know, and what you are assuming. That reduces the risk of overpromising and later appearing dishonest. Another element is congruence, where actions match stated values and priorities. Teams watch leaders closely for this alignment, and small inconsistencies can create skepticism. By making sincerity a visible practice, the book offers a route to healthier feedback loops. People become more willing to raise risks early, challenge decisions productively, and speak about constraints, which improves decision quality and reduces the hidden costs of silence.
Lastly, Repairing Trust: Accountability, Learning, and Rebuilding Care, Trust is inevitably strained by mistakes, competing priorities, or rapid change, so the book’s practical value includes how to repair trust after it is damaged. Repair begins with accurately identifying what was violated: sincerity, reliability, competence, or care. An apology that does not match the breach can make things worse, such as apologizing for a misunderstanding when the issue was repeated unreliability. Effective repair also depends on accountability, including acknowledging impact without defensiveness and clarifying what will change. The book emphasizes rebuilding through behavior, not declarations. People regain confidence when they see consistent follow through, transparent communication, and improved competence where needed. Care is especially important in repair because injured trust often includes the belief that one person valued their own agenda over the relationship. Rebuilding care can involve demonstrating curiosity about the other person’s experience, making fair tradeoffs, and taking visible steps to prevent recurrence even when inconvenient. The book also implies a learning oriented mindset: treat breakdowns as data about systems, expectations, and capabilities, not just personal failures. In organizational settings, leaders can model trust repair by naming issues early, inviting feedback, and reinforcing norms that make it safe to speak up. Over time, a team that repairs trust well becomes more resilient and less fragile under pressure.
